Saturday, November 27, 2010

Cancer conundrum: radiation treatment side effects come and go without any warning

My T-2 tumour and I are having communication problems.
I thought I had it figured out. Thursday was dreadful. My chest felt like it was in a vice, which was in trash compactor, which was being run over by a bus. They're radiating me straight through my esophagus, so it's to be expected.
Friday was much more manageable, in large part because Carol-Ann and I weren't as stubborn about using the hydromorphone, the pain medication that I'm on. We also got in to see our GP, Dr. Jennifer Rogerson, and she prescribed a longer-lasting hydromorphone.
I went to bed Friday night thinking that we had turned the corner.
I went to bed, but I didn't go to sleep. I think I got two hours. Maybe. I wasn't in pain. I just couldn't nod off.
I watched assorted Law and Orders. (Thank goodness for the Mystery Channel.) I kept going back to sports highlights. I didn't dare pass up the Bachelorette, which had the MEN TELLING ALL in a bid to set up the THE MOMENT WE'VE ALL BE WAITING FOR....THE MOST DRAMATIC ROSE CEREMONY EVER. (Oh, Deanna...why ya gotta be like that?)
Most of all, I watched the clock and wondered what was going on.
That's radiation, though. One day, you feel like you can conquer the world. The next, without warning, you're flat on your back.
It's part of what I am learning as this goes a long. I'm also learning, too, that I need to pull back when I'm not feeling well. (I can't lie -- my buddy Fiona Rintoul sent me a text that's sticking with me: "Stop trying  to be a hero, Ewen.")
Laura Hynatzsen, who I've known since we were toddlers and who I haven't seen in some time, was supposed to come over in Saturday morning. I begged off, explaining that I needed more sleep. She understood. I was slated to go to the pool with Carol-Ann's dad, Ron, too, in the early afternoon, and we postponed that, too.
Lucas and Grady Froese, Carol-Ann's second cousins, did come over Saturday night for watch hockey and some video games, and by then I had regrouped.
What will Sunday bring? It's anyone's guess. That's something I'm starting to figure out.

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